Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize