I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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