one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
