Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
It's never too late to be topless.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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