I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize