I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
