I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
