i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize