is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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