My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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