STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
