my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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