I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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