Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize