i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
