I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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