That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
whose parrot is this?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize