chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
