I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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