Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
