So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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