been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize