I don't think brook has ever known best
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
