College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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