on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
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God, you're like boner-b-gone
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
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My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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