I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
