I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize