everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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