I wish i was in the wii world.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
