why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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