so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
