all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
