I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
