I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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