Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
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