dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
