i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
