ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
