I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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