I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
