weddingsv make me drug and hornr
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
