Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
