Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
