Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
