absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
