"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Someone signed my nipple.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
