yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
My vagina is officially offended.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
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