I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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