Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
