we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
