Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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