Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize